Thursday, September 25, 2008

Impersonal Personals Seek Help

If this were 1992 and I was on the dating scene, would I submit a Personal to a newspaper? If I was in college in 1979, would I meet a guy in the local college bar, share a beer, and then we would end up happily ever after? If I was a debutante in 1944, would I marry the doctor my father introduced me to and just assume my life would be complete? Dating in 2008 is hard. I wouldn't want a Personal, a fraternity bar guy, or a doctor my dad knows.....but I'm running out of ideas.

David Wygant, the dating expert, has an interesting blog. He helps men gain confidence, talk to women, and offers advice as to where they can meet a potential girlfriend. Vice versa for women. Every woman knows what it's like to be in a bar, bookstore, party, WHEREVER, and see someone that interests you, but aren't sure if you can go up to them or not. Do they have a girlfriend? Do they have a boyfriend? [that one is hard to tell] Do they find me attractive? Would I make a total fool out of myself if I went up to him? Apparently, the same thing is going through the minds of men.

A few months ago I did the unthinkable....completely uncharictaristic of me, and asked a guy from the gym out. We did hit it off, and then it fizzled out quickly when I realized we weren't a good match. Either way, I did something that I wouldn't normally do - and before I did it I accepted the fact that it could go either way -->he could be into me and he could not be into me. Dealing with the consequences was something I was simply prepared for.

David Wygant posted a blog recently that is so helpful and I think that everyone should read it. He titled it "A Plea To All The Women: Please Help The Guys Out!" - I enjoyed it, and hopefully you will too.

Personals are impersonal, and I would like to take Wygant's advice and meet someone face to face....and hit it off. But if I were to write a personal, perhaps this is what it would say:

SWF seeks SWM with great sense of humor who is caring, thoughtful, and easy going. Must be a successful, driven, and grounded individual. Intellectually curious, love your family and friends, Equally comfortable at a black tie reception as you are at a local bar. Love to travel stay active.

Oh my, I just described the way I view myself - I'm not looking for someone exactly like me, I believe that opposites attract. But the basics are important. So men, start reading Wygant's blog....women, start taking Wygants advice, and maybe our two worlds can intertwine.

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